Back Where I Belong~

At Home! After twelve years of being a 'stay at home mom' all 4 kids go to school all day now. I found myself wondering if I was doing what I needed to be doing or if I need to readjust. Like in most cases, I didn't set off to fill my days with anything outside the normal things that fill my days. Even though it's November I still don't feel like I'm in a good groove yet! Then, Addison's teacher approached me about a month ago asking if I could substitute for her 3 days in November and 2 days in December. I immediately agreed to it. I love teaching. It is hugely rewarding and I love the relationships I get to build with each student and the successes that the school year brings. I find myself at times missing that part of my life. I thought great timing with Christmas coming to have extra cash to spend and what a bonus to get to spend three days with Addison and getting to know her friends better! So, for three days this week I went back to teaching. There were certainly some pros and cons to my experience! One of the neatest things was Rick and I got up earlier each day and spent our quiet time reading God's word together. That was amazing! I have been convicted for some time about how God calls us to seek Him early in the morning. I am NOT an early morning person but I have to say, that early morning quiet time was awesome. One of the biggest cons was not being available when Hunter wasn't feeling good and came home from school early. I learned a lot this week aside from what I've mentioned and I have come to some solid conclusions.

*First and foremost, it is not easy to work full time and still be what I want to be and what I need to be to my family.
*Teaching is mentally and physically exhausting and I'm sure that has NOTHING to do with the fact that I am 12 years older than last time I taught!! ; )
*My family only got my leftovers after pouring myself into 24 little lives for 6.5 hours each day.
*Substituting is much harder than having your own class.
*The extra money is not worth the sacrifices that I had to make this week.
*My validation no longer comes from being a teacher but much more from being the best mom and wife I can be!
*I admire moms who can do both and do both well! There are plenty of moms who seem to pull that off.
*Home is where my heart is and my heart is with my family!

Who knows what the future holds - certainly not me. I do know this - I will commit to prayer what God would have me to do. I so want to be in obedience to Him. If He wants me at home full time He will confirm that for me and if I am to go back to teaching full-time I know He will open the doors for that to happen. Today I feel very certain I am where I belong doing what I need to be doing. I plan to make the most of my time doing the thing I love most of all - being home behind the scenes taking care of my family til each one of them walks through the door each day - then I will pour into them and give them not my leftovers but my best!

Today I am also very grateful that I am here with Preslie - she doesn't feel great. If I was teaching I would probably have sent her because it's just a cold but she doesn't feel 100% and I am thankful I have the luxury of being able to be home fully devoted to her today and I don't have to juggle anything to make that happen! In the night she was awake multiple times and at one point she asked me "Mommy, tomorrow if I am on the couch and I call you, will you come?" and today as I was getting ready for the day she called out "Mommy" and I said "What" and she said "I just love you" - precious and I am once again, truly grateful for my life!